How fab an idea for an online party is this? Kylie of Lucy Violet Vintage and Donna from Hung up on Retro had the inspired idea to host a link up where all the participants agreed to make something, erm, different from one of their retro cookbooks, or from vintage recipe inspiration online. How could I refuse to take part? If you pop over to their blogs you'll discover such tempting delights as 'Salmon party salad' and 'Black Magic Chocolate cake made with condensed tomato soup' (I kid you not). I didn't quite get organised enough to cook an entire three courses, but as it's half term - the time the kids are allowed Nutella on toast or cocoa-pops for breakfast - I decided a new breakfast treat would be perfect. But what to cook?
Let's see, breakfasts...Aah yes, PERFECT
'The Complete Hostess' is a book I found for 20p at a car boot sale earlier in the year, and it's filled with 'Menus, Table Etiquette, Party Hints and Recipes'.
Nell writes with such authority - "The charm of a well-set table can do much to overcome the early morning grumps of some people" - that I knew she'd have a great suggestion or two up her sleeve to 'vary the breakfast menu'. What could be more delicious than 'cod in custard sauce'?
Mmm, cod SMOTHERED in custard
Not being a massive fan of custard I just make it as and when it's demanded from an aged tub of Birds yellow powder, which went out of date sometime after the war. Therefore I've never made 'proper' custard with egg yolks, and was a little alarmed to note Nell's breezy assumption that one would already know how to do it. Still, by the time I'd drunk a little medicinal gin and tonic and smoked a pack and half of cigarettes - so good for the figure! - I was ready to give it my best shot.
"It is wise to provide an ash-tray either on the table or at some convenient place, as nothing is so unpleasant as ash in the tea or coffee cups and saucers"
Nell Heaton
Anyway, I merrily flaked my cold boiled cod - 50s housewife Lakota has no concern for the depletion of the oceans - and whisked away frantically with my hot milk and egg yolks. I'm sure Nell wouldn't have dropped her nutmeg in the custard while she was grating it, but I imagine that just infused it with extra flavour.
Come back Birds, all is forgiven. I'm not sure that the violent yellow colour of powdered custard would have been much less appealing than the anemic looking sauce with speckles which I created - perhaps using that lurid dyed yellow haddock would give it a bit more colour. Or maybe it doesn't matter as I should be using "a gay spotted or checked cloth in my breakfast nook".
I bribed the smallest boy with the promise of something from his trick or treat stash, but typically Boy1 didn't need much persuasion. Do you remember Joey in Friends when Rachel accidentally made a trifle using beef sauteed with peas and onions along with jam and lady-finger biscuits? That's my eldest. "Fish? Good. Custard? GOOOOD". I thought even he would be defeated on seeing his initial expression:
But his 'I'll eat anything' genes won out in the end!
Good job Mum!
Of course I wasn't so evil as to make the boys try something I wasn't willing to eat myself:
Here goes...
Gosh, I'll never eat Kelloggs again!
Who's up for breakfast at my place tomorrow? Anyone?
Lakota x
Have a great weekend and don't forget to check out everyone else's creations!
I love that you dressed for the occasion! Your son looks adorable! I think I may have one of those outdated Bird's custard tubs too (and yeah I still use it -- I think it's like twinkles, will survive the zombie apocalypse!) Too bad I forgot about the chicken feet... (oh man I keep grossing myself out, why do I do that?) XXX Jet
ReplyDeleteI love the concept of a Retro cook-off, although I think I might stick to Chicken Kiev instead of Cod in Custard. Sorry, but eugh. ;-)
ReplyDeleteOh, Lakota!!! Ha ha. Love that!! I may have to join in on this thing going on. And I love the clip from Friends. How can you not love Joey!! xoxo Lynn
ReplyDeleteFish custard! That's soooooooo doctor who!
ReplyDeleteLook how cute you look! Cooking in heels is hardcore. And wait...it was GOOD?
ReplyDeleteWhat a good idea!
ReplyDeleteWhat a good idea!
ReplyDeleteFantastic! And how retro glam do you look?!!
ReplyDeleteBut ...erm....I'll pass on the cod in custard..thanks. :)
(Just done my retro pudding - and after taking the photos I dropped the entire thing - onto the dining room carpet...oh blimey what a mess...but I rescued half of it ..hahaha - nobody is escaping this.)
Sod the cod, I am all excited at seeing YOU! Glamorous and gorgeous and all lipsticked and pinnied up for a spot of custard making and fish boiling! I love it when you put yourself on you blog, Lakota, and your boys are adorable. Boy1 gets extra adorable points for eating yours cod in custard and giving it the thumbs up - he is a good kid!
ReplyDeleteThe retro cook off is a great idea, and your book is clearly full of useful tips for future hostessing! Round to yours for dinner then! xxxxx
You look amazing
ReplyDeleteand I am glad to see no sugar was involved!
Your are so game eating that, that muck! You look lovely in your cute wee pinny. I'm having a hard time deciding which the ultimate worst one was, yours or the spam jelly ring. I think the fact that you actually ate yours gives you the edge!!
ReplyDeleteoh that made me laugh. i even read out bits to bert.
ReplyDeletehee.x
haha! and the pics of you are so cute!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad that you kept standards up by wearing a pinny while cooking. Sorry, but breakfast sounds disgusting! Fabulous fun, though!!!
ReplyDeleteLiz @ Shortbread & Ginger
Ha genius! I'm sure that set you up well for a hectic Saturday! who wouldn't want fish & milk pudding together? What's next Mackeral & semolina? xxx
ReplyDeleteLovely pinnie, but I'll pass on the cod!
ReplyDeleteI have to say, that sounds quite disgusting! What a hero your little boy is though, I thought I had a strong stomach. X
ReplyDeleteI'll pass on the cod n'custard, but it's lovely to see you there you gorgeous creature you!xxxx
ReplyDeleteFish and egg custard I will pass thanks but love your dress :)
ReplyDeleteAs for "proper" custard.......I love it, thank heavens for the Bird family......who incidentally lived where I do. How's that for a bit of pointless and random information ;)
I think the name of your dish is probably the least appealing of all the entries. The idea of cod in custard conjured up all kinds of frightening images in my mind, but the finished dish looks fairly benign. I still can't look at my own photos without feeling a little ill.
ReplyDeleteI love your boys for being such good sports. The thumbs up photo is priceless.
Ok fish and custard, oh my godness me, my stomach was not prepared the reaction it had while reading your post!!!. Love your Ridgeway bowl - so cool!.
ReplyDeletex Tina
Hilarious! Spit Spot! Great choice of dish - Cod and Custard. Two words that should never be listed in the same sentence, let alone a recipe! I love your post. Nell holds such wisdom. Thank you so much for joining in Lakota! I shall pass on breakfast at yours if that's cool.x
ReplyDeleteTotally lol! Love your pinny. My favourite fish dish as a little girl was Fish in cheese sauce, not so vey different, so yum yum!
ReplyDeleteNice retro garb. PERFECT! This dish strikes me as, well, odd. I am not certain what "they" were thinking. All the jello molds etc. were so fashionable. Strange things with fish, even more so. Great job! Nice visiting your blog too.
ReplyDeleteYou did pop on your prettiest apron you gorgeous, GORGEOUS thing you! Thanks for joining in Lakota. I've loved your contribution, but I'm not talking cod-in-custard here. I mean you, your boys, and Nell's hilarious words of wisdom (at last I know how to deal with "the morning grumps"!)
ReplyDeleteIt's been a great little adventure checking out everyones creations - some of them are truly, truly vile.
x
I think that takes the cake for the most spew worthy retro dish. You look so great in your apron. Tam x
ReplyDeleteGin makes everything better! I love this really vile idea, Lakota - brilliant choice. And the apron is perfect!
ReplyDeletefish and custard? How Dr. Who of you.
ReplyDeleteI thought Birds custard powder was proper custard, that's the home made version in our house, otherwise I open a tin of it. You look really cute in your 50's housewife outfit Lakota, but that meal sounds truly horrible, your little boy really is like Joey! Though I would love to have kids that eat anything and everything, you have been blessed! xx
ReplyDeleteIt's because when we think of custard we think 'sweet'. Even so I'm not sure it's breakfast fare. The pinny however, gets my vote.
ReplyDeleteHooray for non-fussy eaters! Did the boys get an ashtray each too?
ReplyDeleteI'm with Curtise on the excitement of seeing you all 50's housewife glam for the occasion. I bet your husband would eat anything you put in front of him if you dressed like that every morning.
Nothing on the cover of that book looks good enough to eat, therefore it was an essential purchase!
Very funny post. Love the thumbs up from your boy.
ReplyDeleteYou look bloody gorgeous, more photos please! The kids are cuties but sorry, that cod is making me wanna chuck up. xxx
ReplyDeleteNice to see your lovely face! That book looks great fun. I'd give the cod a go. xxx
ReplyDeleteYou look amazing, not so sure about the cod! Boy1 is brave indeed!
ReplyDeleteOh how funny, you really look the part and I'm most impressed by your boys, mine would never have eaten that!
ReplyDeleteThat sounds nobly disgusting! You look FAB! And you brightened up the end of the weekend!
ReplyDeleteYou look very retro glam - not sure about the food, but if your boy liked it, well that's a result.
ReplyDeleteYay, it's great to actually see you! Man, the 70's inspired some insane culinary combinations. Not sure I could attempt the cod and custard thing but well done to your unfussy boy. I love kids who just get stuck into anything. But then, I have a natural affinity with good eaters! ;) xx
ReplyDeleteYou are beautiful Lakota, why don´t we see more of you, ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
ReplyDeleteHow are you match 92 people for the swap??? ahhhhhhhhhhhhh hell!!!
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To be truthful I don't even actually KNOW what custard is... but the word sounds like it would be good and I remember Strawberry Shortcake having a friend named Custard soooo then that just makes it seem all the better. But I MUST read what it actually is and maybe even try some.
ReplyDeletep.s. Sometimes I am scared of fish... I dunno I am not a huge fishie lover. BUT if there is lemon butter on hand I am game.
Love your pics you look the part in your cook-off.
Well, you LOOK gorgeous and it's so RARE to see pics of you! I am - LA LA LA - not thinking about _ LA LA LA - the cod in... oh my gourd, I'm gonna pu....
ReplyDeleteYUUUK!
Sarah xxx
Vomit-TASTIC!!!!
ReplyDeleteNice job dressing for the event!
XXX
Good God, the cod.... Never in a squillion years. You and your boys are absolutely gorgeous though. xx
ReplyDeleteI'm physically allergic to fish and mentally allergic to custard. I'm a custardaphobe.
ReplyDeleteEeeww.
Caroline
xxx
OH MY GOD how GORGEOUS are you ;-) Its so lovely to see you, don't hide anymore. Loving your dress and shoes and your red lipstick. Your little one bless him so cute but i can't blame him for not eating that cod sensible lad ;-) dee xx
ReplyDeleteOH MY GOD how GORGEOUS are you ;-) Its so lovely to see you, don't hide anymore. Loving your dress and shoes and your red lipstick. Your little one bless him so cute but i can't blame him for not eating that cod sensible lad ;-) dee xx
ReplyDeleteI love the lurid pictures in the retro cookbooks. some of that stuff looks so.....unappetizing.
ReplyDeleteYou are absolutely hilarious Lakota! Brilliant! I love the fact you looked like the perfect 50's Nigella/Stepford Wives in an incredible outfit too! Lipstick for breakfast, wow! It sounds foul, but I loved that episode of Friends, brill that your son is like that!x
ReplyDeleteSo loving your dress! you look gorgeous Lakota, now that I always wanted to do, dressing up as retro housewife and cooking/baking hahaha pretty apron too! i too not so keen on custard but the look from your boy and yours are definitely making me want to try that cod in custard! hehehehe...i love the book too!
ReplyDeletex susan
Well hello doll face, I've missed you so. I see i've been missing a lot of fun and games on your blog. I'm going to try and wake up earlier now and have some "me" time to visit all my long lost friends before they unfollow me and step on my heart. You look gorgeous and the food looks yummy even though I dont like fish.
ReplyDeleteNice to see you and the Homemaker pattern crockery. Cod custard concoction looks rather revolting.
ReplyDelete